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“You were grossed out by little roaches in the bathroom. Do you have an idea what kind of vermin and raccoons are probably out here?” I asked her as I looked around. It was hot and muggy but sitting next to the fire kept the bugs away.“The fire will keep them away,” she told me confidently. I don’t know how she would know. Neither of us have ever gone camping in our lives.“What about weirdos and creepers?” I asked if the fire would keep away actual guys who wanted to have their way with us.“Well, we’ve already established forty for head, twenty extra if they want to sniff my butt and how much did you get for a fuck?” she was making a very dark joke and while it was funny on some level it made me sad as well.She kept joking with me though until I laughed and told her I only got fifty bucks for sex with that guy.“He seemed like a total MRA asshole,” she laughed.I asked her what that was and she said a Men’s Rights Advocate. She said she the fake set of balls hanging off the back of his. I made my way across the lane and to the right shoulder making note of the last mile marker we pasted. Sadly and surprisingly finding the spare was also flat we called for assistance. It took some time coming so I did my best to tease him both visually and mentally. When the guy did show up all he had to offer was a toe to the next jerk water town where we could get the tire fixed in the morning. The only luck was the motel that had only four room had one available. We left the car across the street at the gas station and made our way to the motel. Squared away now on to our room. My cousin was a bit shocked that there was only one bed and spoke of changing it. That was until I reminded him it was the only room available and that it’s fine, we’re both adult and very tired adding odds our we will fall asleep before our heads hit the pillows. I then yelled dibs on taking the first shower. After doing so I told him that it gets real steamy in there and he might want to leave the door.
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